Proof that my dog is an evil genius

[sarine]

"Chewing on his bed because he's pissed at me because I put him in his bed to wait 10 minutes to go out again because he didn't poop"
"NOM NOM NOM"
MOCHI NO, CHEW THE RIGHT THINGS
"Goes back"
MOCHI, NO!
"Bitch *sulk* *wait* NOM NOM NOM ON THE ZIP TIE"
MOCHI YOU LITTLE FUCKER WHAT DID I SAY!?
"Damnit, you ass... fine.. ooo look see I play with the blue chewie NOM NOM NOM"
*sigh*
"MWHAHAHAHA NOW I PUT BLUE CHEWIE ON TOP OF WHAT I WANT TO CHEW AND ACTUALLY CHEW THAT"
YOU LITTLE.... DAMNIT MOCHI I CAN SEE WHAT YOU'RE DOING!
"FOILED AGAIN!"
(He tried that stunt a few more times to see if I'd fall for it)

He's currently sulking against the couch chewing his blue chewie and occasionally making very feint whining noises.

Right after I typed that he went to chewing the corner of his bed when I turned around, I say "Mochi, no" and he stopped and actually went "whine whine whine... fine I eat blue chewie while also eating side of bed hahaha"

*sigh* This happened about 10 minutes ago.